No Longer Striving for A

For quite some time I have struggled to feel as though I have a handle on my calling. I have been praying, reading, seeking doing all I can to try to figure it out. Define it. I have been begging God to reveal it to me. I want what he designed for me. I want to go after it and be successful…..but what….. Should I organize and hold retreats for women? My heart would overrun with joy and excitement as I watch God move not to mention the immense pleasure of being invited into these moments with him; MAN I could/would be satisfied. Surely that is it; right God? Should I be a Lawyer? I have wanted to be a lawyer since I was a little girl. Surely that is something you designed in me and that must be it; right God? Should I open a coffee shop focused on community outreach? Oh the daily gratification of the room to focus on being your hands and feet. Surely this would bring joy to your heart; right God? Should I join or start a nonprofit that seeks to support and change the lives of children all over the world? Little boys in Rwanda, Cuba, and Haiti, little girls in Mexico, China, and the Philippines = feed them, get them education, adopt? Surely this fills my heart and pulls forth my passion fueling each day’s work this is it; right God?

I’m not getting any younger; why does it feel like I can’t answer this question of what my calling is? How is it that I don’t have milestones completed along the path for what I have been called to? I can’t point to any I don’t think.

But

there isn’t a place you have called me to

there isn’t a career, job, position, or title you have marked as my calling

there isn’t a thing you have called me to achieve

is there?    

NO!

You are not a God of a

There is not a single place you have called me to go, one thing to accomplish, or to be. You have invited me on a journey. Not a short trip with a planned destination, but an uncharted prolonged adventure where you are bringing me to new frontier of exploration each day and surely in each season.

God, my calling is the very kindling you have infused within me to pull me like a magnetic to each and every new horizon and quest you will be bringing me to.

My calling is the very intricate design you have carved, molded, and shaped within me to present in each new escapade as the most perfect fit and necessary tool for that moment and mission.

My calling is the approach I am uniquely crafted and predestined to use in each of the new doors and situations you will bring me to and through.

Today my calling is to be a light/a calm (ME – the me that remains in you) in a location you have positioned me in. I am who you created me to be and I work in the ways you have crafted my experience and education to produce. Tomorrow/our next exploration together, my calling may be to use that same character and those same conventional ways that are particular to me

to lead, teach, and raise my children                OR

to support in prayer, time, assistance, guidance, and management 

another       OR

to arrange the travel of others in which they discover a new you         OR AND THEN

to visit many cities and countries discovering your glory and brilliance of design and creation while those near me are encouraged to trust you

See you are the God of more than enough. Your thoughts are not my thoughts. Your ways are higher than my ways. God your calling for me is for more than a anything….your calling for me is everything. My calling is the character you are building in me, the style you are developing me to use, the thought process you've established in me for which I funnel everything, the creativity which fuels my abilities, and most of all the worship you have designed and know me to seek in sustaining all of the above.

After all, calling is defined as a strong urge toward a particular way. This is best known and understood as my natural God given approach, being, habits, and desires. And let’s be honest, as I read the many scriptures where you “call” or where we are “called” ; that calling IS an invitation, a hope, a lifestyle; a fluid arch and current unending.

I always am and will forever be abiding in my calling which will go many places, be many assignments, and accomplish many things. I am soooo excited!! Best of all, there is no wait! I am in and successful with my calling right now! Thank you!